12:12 SPECIAL!
Hello there.. My birthday which was on the 11th of July was an eventful occasion. I did what I had't done before "sha..." You really aren't expecting me to tell you right? Owkies,, if you want to know, just hang on, I'll let you have it in a couple of shakes. But first, this intriguing nugget was put together just for you. However, some of you might have read it on my facebook page "Life Educator" or you can follow the link https://www.facebook.com/pages/Life-Educator/380290705404982?ref=hl for more articles to make you go Ooops! Anyways, I still had to make it available on this blog to my readers who haven't read this. It will doubtlessly upgrade your "emotional wisdom" (poetic license) for this special season and as you build positive expectations for 2015! Hey, stay glued to this blog and let's make our experience interactive.. This is my special "12:12" offer this season. haahhahhha.. Just in case you are still wondering what 12:12 is, it simply means 12th day of the 12th Month. Merry Xmas Cronies.
WHAT FIGHTER IS SHE?
If as a man you are a protector and looking for a fighter, the first question you should ask is What kind of fighter is she? And if you’re the lady, ask yourself the ultimate question, What kind of fighter am I?
What tickles you? A girl who is purpose driven should always have the answer to this question on her lips. If she doesn’t, then she’s not a fighter. She will definitely be a money-drainage system. No offense to the ladies! I know taking care of a lady is not cheap, but this fighter will doubtlessly be quite difficult. If she knows what tickles her she will be propelled in that direction to become it or achieve it. She will be her own fighter! Since the men are always interested to talk about achievements, she will be an amazing partner for such discuss to be raised.
The question or thought you should be concerned about as the protector when you are in or about to get into a relationship is “What kind of fighter is she? Is she my kind of fighter?” From my view, I have discovered that there are three kinds of lady fighters, or maybe I should say, other fighters fall in these three categories.
In my opinion, there are those who are fighters by “Emotional Adhesives.” I regard them as fighters by virtue of their emotional attachment to their partners. These are those who can go to any considerable length for their partners. They often times or at some point in time think of how their lives will be but have not really made deliberate and serious plans in actualizing those plans, so as such, they depend on others, especially their protectors, to make this happen for them. Like I already said that they haven’t really made deliberate future plans for themselves, in fact, they don’t have specific standards for the kind of man in their lives, i.e. they might fall for almost anything “handsome and caring” guy. Because of their emotional adhesives, they depend on their protector to help bring out the best in them. However, some protectors who are aware of this, desire to take advantage of such weak fighters.
A very salient quality of these kind of fighters is that they are also principled; they have principles too because every lady does. But they only get to set more standards and principles by virtue of “mostly” the negative occurrences in their lives, and not by being proactive. No doubt they are fighters, but their emotional anchors are firmly rooted in the soil of this relationship. Again, such people are slightly afraid to talk about their past relationships because of the fears they think lurk in the future; maybe future career, more future break-ups and hazards of future relationships. At this point, permit me to offer a Gem of advice from one of the diverse explanations of Pareto’s principle which is, 20% of the things we often ignore make up about 80% of our lives. That means, talking about little things as such is a contributing factor to the major in their relationship. Also, they scarcely talk about future goals and dreams because they are too concerned with the emotions of the past and fears of the unseen. How these fighters derive motivations are strongly hinged to the pressure and drive from their protectors, because they always wouldn’t want to hurt him; just always seeking for ways to please him. Any protector who has such a partner as a fighter should regard these four things I’m about to tell you. Still in my opinion like I earlier warned, I think such fighters would need the following; 1) Self-discovery, which is a very essential tool required for your daily business, and more so, for your intra-personal and inter-personal relationships. Lady, you must constantly be in the search to know yourself, 2) they should sit and critically analyze their past relationships but not dwelling on it. Create a platform for your past to be discussed because, psychology has clearly taught us that there is a pattern in human behavior for which recurring circumstances happen. By doing this, they open doors for which they can be helped to avoid more future mistakes and also, they will eventually get to know what and the kind of protectors they really want in life (every lady needs this therapy too). This helps you set measurable standards in life, 3) they should drive themselves to think and talk about their future goals and plans of achievement more often, 4) they need a highly motivated protector if they really want to have a sense of accomplishment or truly achieve success.
Moreover, I couldn’t have left out from mentioning that, a very rare feature about this kind of fighters is that they are overly caring and loving! Yea, this is true! You might ask how come I am so sure. Well, you’re smart enough to figure it out. Do you know why they are this way? Because the emotions and energy they ought to have expended planning, strategising and consistently building their own lives, they put it into building their relationship. But this doesn’t imply that any fighter who is overly caring to his protector isn’t a planner or a strategist. Emphatically no! Like I said, there’s always a pattern. Remarkably impressive is the fact that, these fighters often adopt their partner’s modus operandi and become better. A nugget of advice; discover yourself even more while you’re still in that relationship especially if your partner (guy) seeks to take advantage of your priceless self.
Now, let’s pause for a minute. I can hardly believe all these thoughts came from me, but, I do now anyway!
So lady, if you really want to become better, now you know this, don’t expend your energy talking about your emotions. Of course I know you ladies do this a lot but, give me a break y’all. Simply ask yourself this question; All your life you’ve been emotional about your emotional life, where has your emotions taken you? Only around in emotional circles! Please, cut the bull crap that “that’s the kind of person I am.” You make up and break up, get back together and then fight again, just because your emotional needs haven’t been met. Girlfriend, listen to me, you can become better and set your standards aright.
Alright! Back up for a moment there sweet! Before I begin to get murmurs and rains of derogatory insults from you, I know we all have a craving for love and care because I do too, and I’m also aware your emotions are like the fuel in your relationship engine but, I think you’re smart enough to figure it out. You can always spend time for soul-lifting talks and engage your emotions positively like most of you already do. Kudos!
Fascinatingly, when this fighter recognizes that she is a baggage (because they eventually do), she would say something like, “I know I am not who you want me to be but I’m going to keep trying.” The smarter ones recognize this nonetheless, and wish to become even better than they already were especially, if her protector is a highly motivated personality.
Another interesting thing you ladies ought to observe is this, just as much as you need to feel secure, confident and have a sense of emotional achievement in your relationship, the men (your protectors) also need as much confidant, security and the actuality of their life’s achievement in you, his fighter. Realize this that, we make decisions emotionally but analyze logically such thoughts as if our fighters can be up to par with respect to our own standards; handle the family in our absence, maybe handling our company, talking us up after a turn out we didn’t expect at work, be emotionally strong when we need them to, etc. So fighter, (girl, lady or woman) up the ante in your emotions. Engage yourself with more productive tasks. But guys or protectors, whatsoever you call yourself, choose to stick to her. They will often chat about stuffs that are important to them to pass the time or so, they won’t have to talk about the other manly interesting stuffs. Stick to them anyway. It goes with the territory.
A little of my therapy that I think will help and it always does is; First list the qualities of the kind of fighter you want to be and thereafter, list the qualities of the kind of protector you want, both in the present tense. For instance, “I am emotionally strong” or “He is…” (You know the drill). Next, prioritize your values as listed here in this value system; Education, suitor, relationship, self-development, integrity, family, seek job, spiritual, become a graduate, financial independence, business, academics, career pursuit, discipline, wardrobe, investment, build self-esteem, emotional intelligence etc. I’d prefer you write out the values separately on little sheets of papers or post-it papers and arrange them until your priorities are organized. Some of the values might level out or some values you might even include for your convenience but, keep adjusting it until you have what you want…
Our second kind of fighter is the class of ladies who are “Emotionally Intriguing"
to be continued...
Love, Ambassador
Hello there.. My birthday which was on the 11th of July was an eventful occasion. I did what I had't done before "sha..." You really aren't expecting me to tell you right? Owkies,, if you want to know, just hang on, I'll let you have it in a couple of shakes. But first, this intriguing nugget was put together just for you. However, some of you might have read it on my facebook page "Life Educator" or you can follow the link https://www.facebook.com/pages/Life-Educator/380290705404982?ref=hl for more articles to make you go Ooops! Anyways, I still had to make it available on this blog to my readers who haven't read this. It will doubtlessly upgrade your "emotional wisdom" (poetic license) for this special season and as you build positive expectations for 2015! Hey, stay glued to this blog and let's make our experience interactive.. This is my special "12:12" offer this season. haahhahhha.. Just in case you are still wondering what 12:12 is, it simply means 12th day of the 12th Month. Merry Xmas Cronies.
WHAT FIGHTER IS SHE?
If as a man you are a protector and looking for a fighter, the first question you should ask is What kind of fighter is she? And if you’re the lady, ask yourself the ultimate question, What kind of fighter am I?
What tickles you? A girl who is purpose driven should always have the answer to this question on her lips. If she doesn’t, then she’s not a fighter. She will definitely be a money-drainage system. No offense to the ladies! I know taking care of a lady is not cheap, but this fighter will doubtlessly be quite difficult. If she knows what tickles her she will be propelled in that direction to become it or achieve it. She will be her own fighter! Since the men are always interested to talk about achievements, she will be an amazing partner for such discuss to be raised.
The question or thought you should be concerned about as the protector when you are in or about to get into a relationship is “What kind of fighter is she? Is she my kind of fighter?” From my view, I have discovered that there are three kinds of lady fighters, or maybe I should say, other fighters fall in these three categories.
In my opinion, there are those who are fighters by “Emotional Adhesives.” I regard them as fighters by virtue of their emotional attachment to their partners. These are those who can go to any considerable length for their partners. They often times or at some point in time think of how their lives will be but have not really made deliberate and serious plans in actualizing those plans, so as such, they depend on others, especially their protectors, to make this happen for them. Like I already said that they haven’t really made deliberate future plans for themselves, in fact, they don’t have specific standards for the kind of man in their lives, i.e. they might fall for almost anything “handsome and caring” guy. Because of their emotional adhesives, they depend on their protector to help bring out the best in them. However, some protectors who are aware of this, desire to take advantage of such weak fighters.
A very salient quality of these kind of fighters is that they are also principled; they have principles too because every lady does. But they only get to set more standards and principles by virtue of “mostly” the negative occurrences in their lives, and not by being proactive. No doubt they are fighters, but their emotional anchors are firmly rooted in the soil of this relationship. Again, such people are slightly afraid to talk about their past relationships because of the fears they think lurk in the future; maybe future career, more future break-ups and hazards of future relationships. At this point, permit me to offer a Gem of advice from one of the diverse explanations of Pareto’s principle which is, 20% of the things we often ignore make up about 80% of our lives. That means, talking about little things as such is a contributing factor to the major in their relationship. Also, they scarcely talk about future goals and dreams because they are too concerned with the emotions of the past and fears of the unseen. How these fighters derive motivations are strongly hinged to the pressure and drive from their protectors, because they always wouldn’t want to hurt him; just always seeking for ways to please him. Any protector who has such a partner as a fighter should regard these four things I’m about to tell you. Still in my opinion like I earlier warned, I think such fighters would need the following; 1) Self-discovery, which is a very essential tool required for your daily business, and more so, for your intra-personal and inter-personal relationships. Lady, you must constantly be in the search to know yourself, 2) they should sit and critically analyze their past relationships but not dwelling on it. Create a platform for your past to be discussed because, psychology has clearly taught us that there is a pattern in human behavior for which recurring circumstances happen. By doing this, they open doors for which they can be helped to avoid more future mistakes and also, they will eventually get to know what and the kind of protectors they really want in life (every lady needs this therapy too). This helps you set measurable standards in life, 3) they should drive themselves to think and talk about their future goals and plans of achievement more often, 4) they need a highly motivated protector if they really want to have a sense of accomplishment or truly achieve success.
Moreover, I couldn’t have left out from mentioning that, a very rare feature about this kind of fighters is that they are overly caring and loving! Yea, this is true! You might ask how come I am so sure. Well, you’re smart enough to figure it out. Do you know why they are this way? Because the emotions and energy they ought to have expended planning, strategising and consistently building their own lives, they put it into building their relationship. But this doesn’t imply that any fighter who is overly caring to his protector isn’t a planner or a strategist. Emphatically no! Like I said, there’s always a pattern. Remarkably impressive is the fact that, these fighters often adopt their partner’s modus operandi and become better. A nugget of advice; discover yourself even more while you’re still in that relationship especially if your partner (guy) seeks to take advantage of your priceless self.
Now, let’s pause for a minute. I can hardly believe all these thoughts came from me, but, I do now anyway!
So lady, if you really want to become better, now you know this, don’t expend your energy talking about your emotions. Of course I know you ladies do this a lot but, give me a break y’all. Simply ask yourself this question; All your life you’ve been emotional about your emotional life, where has your emotions taken you? Only around in emotional circles! Please, cut the bull crap that “that’s the kind of person I am.” You make up and break up, get back together and then fight again, just because your emotional needs haven’t been met. Girlfriend, listen to me, you can become better and set your standards aright.
Alright! Back up for a moment there sweet! Before I begin to get murmurs and rains of derogatory insults from you, I know we all have a craving for love and care because I do too, and I’m also aware your emotions are like the fuel in your relationship engine but, I think you’re smart enough to figure it out. You can always spend time for soul-lifting talks and engage your emotions positively like most of you already do. Kudos!
Fascinatingly, when this fighter recognizes that she is a baggage (because they eventually do), she would say something like, “I know I am not who you want me to be but I’m going to keep trying.” The smarter ones recognize this nonetheless, and wish to become even better than they already were especially, if her protector is a highly motivated personality.
Another interesting thing you ladies ought to observe is this, just as much as you need to feel secure, confident and have a sense of emotional achievement in your relationship, the men (your protectors) also need as much confidant, security and the actuality of their life’s achievement in you, his fighter. Realize this that, we make decisions emotionally but analyze logically such thoughts as if our fighters can be up to par with respect to our own standards; handle the family in our absence, maybe handling our company, talking us up after a turn out we didn’t expect at work, be emotionally strong when we need them to, etc. So fighter, (girl, lady or woman) up the ante in your emotions. Engage yourself with more productive tasks. But guys or protectors, whatsoever you call yourself, choose to stick to her. They will often chat about stuffs that are important to them to pass the time or so, they won’t have to talk about the other manly interesting stuffs. Stick to them anyway. It goes with the territory.
A little of my therapy that I think will help and it always does is; First list the qualities of the kind of fighter you want to be and thereafter, list the qualities of the kind of protector you want, both in the present tense. For instance, “I am emotionally strong” or “He is…” (You know the drill). Next, prioritize your values as listed here in this value system; Education, suitor, relationship, self-development, integrity, family, seek job, spiritual, become a graduate, financial independence, business, academics, career pursuit, discipline, wardrobe, investment, build self-esteem, emotional intelligence etc. I’d prefer you write out the values separately on little sheets of papers or post-it papers and arrange them until your priorities are organized. Some of the values might level out or some values you might even include for your convenience but, keep adjusting it until you have what you want…
Our second kind of fighter is the class of ladies who are “Emotionally Intriguing"
to be continued...
Love, Ambassador
I am looking forward to the continuation of this article. IT IS EDUCATIVE! Keep up the good work Ambassador.
ReplyDeleteHello Cindy
DeleteJust want to say thank you for the encouragement